By Elizabeth Jannuzzi

I’ve been sober for 14 and a half years. And for all these years—moreover a trip or two and an sickness right here or there—I’ve attended the identical Alcoholics Nameless assembly, what we in restoration name “a house group.” We’ve switched areas a number of instances and through COVID, we moved to Zoom. In any other case, it’s been the identical individuals selecting to attach Wednesdays at 8 p.m., week after week. 

Nicely, some of the identical individuals. About 20 individuals have been there your complete time I’ve. We’re on this sober journey collectively, consoling one another by job losses, divorces, or a beloved one’s passing, in addition to celebrating wins corresponding to new properties, marriages, and children graduating school.

However different dwelling group members keep for a number of months, constructing friendships, sharing tales, after which vanish with out rationalization. Possibly they moved away or switched teams. Or perhaps they drifted from AA altogether. Maybe they’ve relapsed. We long-timers play the “keep in mind them?” recreation:

“Keep in mind George? He at all times wore a tie-dye and talked about staying sober at Lifeless exhibits?” Or “No matter occurred to Sue with the lengthy brown hair who introduced her two children each week?”

We attain out to those lacking members, asking, “The place’ve you been? How are you doing?” However that’s all we will do. We will’t make somebody attend the house group or keep sober.  

My writing accountability group, Morning Pages supplied by Challenge Write Now, follows an identical sample. Since October 2024, a gaggle of writers have met each weekday to put in writing collectively on Zoom. Monday by Friday, we log in at 8 a.m. ET, greet each other and state our targets. Then, we flip off our cameras and audio and write. After an hour, we return to the Zoom and report on our progress.

We’re on this writing journey collectively, supporting one another by struggles corresponding to getting a submission rejection from a beloved lit magazine or falling behind on phrase depend targets for our books in progress. And we rejoice one another’s wins together with a Substack launch, an essay acceptance, and a memoir getting revealed.

However like my AA dwelling group, some writers present as much as Morning Pages for every week or two, permitting the group to turn out to be invested of their targets, after which vanish with out rationalization. Like in AA, we play the “keep in mind them?” recreation:

“Keep in mind Sarah? She was engaged on her memoir about educating in rural faculties.” Or “No matter occurred to Bob and his private essay about babysitting?”

Because the employees host, I would ship an e mail: “We’ve missed you at Morning Pages. Hope you come again. Your story issues.” However that’s all I can do.

Each my AA dwelling group and Morning Pages exist to help their members, however you need to present as much as obtain that help. In restoration, consistency isn’t about good attendance. It’s about making a rhythm that turns into stronger than your impulses. The identical applies to writing. Expertise issues, nevertheless it’s the writers who present up each day, even when inspiration doesn’t, who end their private essays and memoirs.

There’s one thing each humbling and liberating about this reality. You possibly can’t depend on exterior accountability to maintain you long run. The neighborhood will attain out while you disappear, however ultimately, they transfer on to assist the individuals who preserve exhibiting up. The work – whether or not it’s staying sober or getting phrases on the web page – finally occurs within the each day option to be current.

Consistency isn’t glamorous, nevertheless it’s the whole lot. Present up sufficient instances, and ultimately, you turn out to be somebody who simply exhibits up – in writing, restoration, and life.

___

Elizabeth Jannuzzi’s writing explores themes of loss, motherhood, and restoration from alcoholism. She has been revealed in The Rumpus, Memoir Monday, WOW! Ladies On Writing, and earned a Better of the Web nomination in 2023. She presently leads a yearlong Memoir Incubator supplied by bookinc.org. Whereas ready for her debut memoir, SOBER MOM, to be revealed by She Writes Press in July 2026, Elizabeth writes a weekly Substack e-newsletter.